It Takes Two
It takes two persons to work at keeping a love relationship strong and healthy.
I would like to start this article expressing that is has been my experience that it takes two to keep love strong in a relationship. We all know that when we first fall in love how easy it is to stay in that blissful stage, the lovemaking is out of this world and you see your partner as the perfect lover and nothing else. Well guess what, that ain’t happening.
I recently fell deep mad in love and I mean deep Mad in love with the love of my life. I knew in the back of my mind that this would eventually die down and I would be in a situation where I wasn’t sure what to do next.
Last December my beloved and I began to do deep warm Yoni massage to try and open her up even stronger. Well guess what happened? My beloved froze and became the “Ice Queen”. All of a sudden she was back into her process. The yoni work brought up old rapes and past dark experiences for her.
I tried everything possible to get my baby back. She was just 100% shut down. The more I tried to change her mind by begging her to make love, she downright would say no! All the sudden I found myself slowly shutting down as well.
What happened to that beautiful Goddess who brought me to that blissful love making session no matter how hard I tried I wanted it to go back to the way used to be. This is why I’m writing this article to share my experience of what I think works to help mend our hearts back together and even grow stronger
The most important lesson I learned has been how important it is for each person to continue their daily Tantra practice. As well as Eye gazing, breathing, tapping and any other modality that brings you back to your presence. We all need to keep a daily practice with our higher power. When I keep that daily practice strong it is less likely that I will become reactive to my beloveds process. When I shut down, my heart closes and I get back up into my monkey mind and become sad, scared and angry.
It is so important to understand when your beloved is deep in her process. It’s her issues and and not mine! Once I accept, then I can slowly detach with love and keep my energy clear.
This past weekend my beloved took a trip and it was so helpful to have taken the space that was so desperately needed from each other. It gave me the opportunity to understand that all I was doing was taking on her energy and shutting down myself. It also gave me the opportunity to see that once we were both clear again we could live our lives working towards all those wonderful possibilities of growing with each other and living a blissful life.
I am going to begin structuring a strong daily intentional meditational practice with myself with my beloved. Because if I don’t it will be over and I’ll say to myself once again, love sucks! The next few articles that I want to write about are going to be about some of the daily practices that I learned from my beloved. I know that the love is there, we just we just need to work really hard at getting it back again stronger than ever.